Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Bessie Returns to Marian

Dear friends of Bessie:
This has been a long, painful week. Bessie was taken into the hospital last Monday, February 15th, unable to stand on her own. After many days of iv's, she was able to stand and walk again, though her blood count showed great damage to her kidneys. Everything possible was done to help her recover, but to no avail. Her blood count stayed unbelievably high.

I had a 'reading' Tuesday, and Marian came through, asking us to let her go. Bessie's work here was done, providing Marian with comfort which no human could have done, being with her 24/7. Bessie then came to us after July 2, 2009 to comfort us and help us through our grief. I visited her yesterday and she looked at me with pleading eyes.

Bessie was set free today, Wednesday 24, 2010 at 5 p.m. by Dr. Walters. She will be cremated and her ashes will be put into Marian's space at the Columbarium.

I can see her now, jumping for joy at the sight of Marian, licking her face — they are running and playing, both whole, healthy and full of life — joyous at the reunion of two beautiful spirits.

Thank you all for caring,
Wanda and Philip

Saturday, December 26, 2009

Merry Xmas Love. Not a day goes by that some part of you: your incredible presence, love of life, literature, art, food, family and friends graces my memory. There's a place in my heart no one can touch Marian but you. I miss you, I love you and I'm so grateful for all that we shared together. How would I have survied my first years in ND without you and Bessie Lamb? You were my biggest supporter, motivator/inspiration and collaborator. You inspired me in a way that I hadn't made contact with in a long time, an artist knows when it feels right and finally it felt right again.

Meg said, "Marian was one of those people with presence, bigger than life, like a movie star." It's true. It amazed me at how heads would turn watching you when we were out and about. You never let on but you knew. You said to me once, "People just don't make an effort in ND (about their dress)". I found it equally amazing at how children were drawn to you. I think they sensed your inner playfulness and skepticism of what the adult world felt was "appropriate". How many other grown women were invited to tea parties? How many other women would not only accept the invitation but delight in the opportunity to dress for the occassion in long gloves and stunning hat with accessories? You never talked down to young people and that too is what drew them to you.

You were a challenge. If you didn't want an honest answer then don't ask, right? You had a way of driving me nuts because practical never seemed to even enter into your world view. But, you also showed me how to live each moment without fear. I've never known anyone that seemed to know how to get the most out of every experience as you.

There's too much to say about you woman so I will try to say it in my art. I hope you'll keep your promise and continue to inspire me. I'm sorry that at times I can't find it in my heart for joyful release. I try, I do but then I just miss you and there is no joy in that for me. All my love. Marilyn

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Holiday Memories

Just thought I would shoot an email, was thinking of Marian.....missing her.

She and I used to enjoy a glass of wine together at her parents' house around holidays. She was such an amazing hostess. Anyway, I will miss her a lot this thanksgiving. I know the house will be filled with stories about her and memories of her so we will be laughing and smiling through the tears as we talk about her.

Anyway, just thought I would share my little memory.

Thanks for keeping up the blog.

Marian's Cousin,


Tuesday, September 1, 2009

My daughter has passed on.
I am very sad.
There is a hole in my heart.
However, this short note is for neither Marian nor I. It is for four angels:
Kelley Mullin
Libby DeBattista
Angie Noel
Jnani Chapman

Never in my sixty eight years have I seen such selflessness, such devotion, such love and caring as these four women showed to my daughter as she came to the end of her days.
They cooked for her, fed her and then cleaned up after.
They washed her clothes and helped her wash herself.
They read to her when her eyes were too tired to read for herself.
They tracked her meds and made sure she took the right ones at the right time.
They prayed for her and with her.
They slept on the floor at night in case they were needed in the middle of the night.
In short they made the last days of Marian’s life on this earth one of peace and tranquility and allowed her to pass quietly and with dignity.
I love you and thank you all for all you did for Marian.


A Piece of Her Heart

After hearing the kind words of so many people at Marian’s service after her passing, I realized that I was just one of the hundreds of people who Marian gave a little piece of her heart, and her time, to show them new ways to enjoy life. I met Marian through a volunteer group for breast cancer patients named Shanti. Marian invited Shanti and me into her life in early 2008. From the first day I met her, I knew that the time I spent with Marian was going to be enjoyable, unique, and enlightening. I initially thought Marian had brought Shanti into her life to have someone help out with things like picking up groceries, organic foods and teas, planting vegetables and flowers, cleaning up around the house, and to find someone to play a tiny, almost insignificant practical and emotional support role relative to the support she received from Len, Austin, her parents and her other family members and friends every day. It became quite obvious, after only a few afternoons with Marian, that like so many other individuals and organizations, I was invited into Marian’s life under the premise that I would be providing the assistance and support, but in reality, it was me who received the gift – the gift of spending time in the presence of someone so unique, selfless, thoughtful, and dynamic. Marian was a truly special person, someone who could make a positive impact on someone’s life in just a few brief moments.

Marian – I only hope our fun days together were even half as meaningful to you as they were to me. I will always miss you, and will never forget you.


Thursday, July 30, 2009

Marian and I were friends for about 17 years. In the last few years our communication consisted of messages on answering machines. I missed her very much then, as I do now.

At Marian's service I recognized very few people other than her immediate family. Austin was so grown up, a man, and that gave me more solace than anything. When Marian would make me dinner (almost every night) when we were neighbors on Carl Street, Austin would be right beside her making the dressing for the salad. He was only about 3 or 4, but if he wanted to cook, then that's what she would teach him. She was such a good Mommy.

Then, when he got a little older, she would fight tooth and nail to make sure he got the very best attention he could at school and at home. I loved looking at the collection of books she had for him. I would lay on her floor for hours next to the spinning bookcase - Marian and Austin's library.

If you can believe it, I knew Marian before she loved animals. I remember the first time she agreed to cat sit. Her apartment was meticulous and she spent days picking up cat hair! She was a good friend above all though, and would always allow my blue eyed dog Jack to sleep on her floor. She said it was only because he was so handsome. Always the aesthete.

I heard so many stories at the service about what Marian brought to people's lives and my story is the same. She opened my eyes to books, music, organizational skills :), treasure chests (she had so many!), fancy cosmetics, truly loving friendship, I could go on and on. I'm so lucky to have known her.

My best to Augie Dog and all her family and friends.
Much love,
Angela (Scott) Donlan

Thursday, July 23, 2009

My darling daughter Marian...

I held you in my arms when you were born, I held you in my arms as you left this world.
My arms are empty now, but my heart is very very full.
I love you forever,